What time is it?

This year, I decided to fight back and not set my clock forward one hour. That’s right, I’m boycotting Daylight Savings Time. Why? Because I hate it. Daylight savings not only shortens our lifetime, but it also disturbs my body’s natural biorhythms. When I become accustomed to getting out of bed at my regular time and I’m forced to suddenly wake up an hour earlier, it sends my body into a violent shock that only an autistic child could fully appreciate. My stomach rejects food, my vision becomes blurred, and most importantly, I miss my Dr. Phil. It’s really not worth the distress.

Sunday I awoke at 7 a.m. and there was light shining outside my window. Birds sang as my window and I had a beautiful, productive day. Monday I woke up at 7 a.m. and it was still dark out…so besides being sleep-deprived, my spirits were shattered by being forced to suddenly rise in darkness.

Eventually, the winter rolls back around and we set our clocks back an hour, which makes things feel like a Stephen King novel for about a week. All of a sudden, it’s pitch black at 3 o’ clock in the afternoon and all the birds go away. It’s quite a sadistic cycle.

What’s worse is, I never know when DST is coming. Year after year, I’m caught off guard by the impending time shift. It’s always the same scenario; I’m watching the nightly news and then boom!

” And don’t forget to set your clocks ahead one hour this Sunday night!”

“Noooooooooo!!! Curse you DST!!”

And why does Daylight Savings Time always begin at some obscure hour in the dead of night? Sunday at 2 a.m.-get real. I hate waiting up all night to walk around my home winding clocks as if I were Father Time adjusting the world’s chronometer. Its Sunday night, I have to be up early the next day.

For those of you who don’t Google, the purpose of Daylight Saving Time (often referred called “Summer Time” in many places of the world) is to make better use of daylight. Supposedly, we change our clocks during the summer months to move an hour of daylight from the morning to the evening.

Fine, then why don’t we just permanently set our clocks back thirty minutes in the fall and end this madness? Stop shortening our lives. Besides, what does “make a better use of daylight” really mean? I’ve been submitting to Daylight Savings Time for 23 years now, and my dad never played an extra game of catch with me or built me a tree house because it was April. I want my hour back.

There are some that would claim DST is a benefit to farmers. Personally, if I were a farmer, I would hate Daylight Savings Time because it would mean milking cows at 5am when its still dark outside. My poor little brother lives in Washington, which means this morning he stood on a dark, icy road waiting for the school bus.

It’s pretty much a raw deal for everyone.

I’ve done the mathematics, and according to my TX-318 graphing calculator, if I never acknowledge daylight savings again, by the time I am 59 years old I will have added exactly two days to my total lifespan. Two days I could have spent biking through Sweden or finishing my memoirs.

Do yourself a favor and rewind your clocks back 60 minutes. I promise, it will be the best hour you’ve ever spent.

–Jamaal Bachelor

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