Peer confrontations

Gather round children, it is story time. Grab your juice box and your favorite blanket, it is quite a long story, so get comfortable.

Once upon a time, there was a large group of friends. At first, they all got along well. It started off as cordial, and then grew into something much more. They all grew so close that they basically became each other’s best friends. From taking all the same classes together, attending major life events with one another and doing things outside of school together, you would not find a group as close as this.

Now as you can imagine, there were some issues – nothing major, just little things here and there that seemed to bug one person or another, but nothing that would cause a rift between the friends. When things started to go amiss, everyone thought they would bounce back. It was just a rough patch that this group would overcome together. They would help one another overcome the ‘hardship’ that they all had to endure and emerge victorious.

However, this is not how the story played out. After some time, it seems that this set of friends began to turn on one another. Rather than addressing any issues they had with each other they held their tongue. They abandoned their ‘friends’ for what seemed like petty differences and a lack of association. Rather than trying to work things out and make things better within the group, some went one way and others went another not caring about the rift that was created.

When this first happened, things were tense. There was conversation between the individuals, but nothing like it was before. Where they would once pass each other in the halls, say hello and stop to have a full blown conversation not worrying about being late to class, turned into not even acknowledging one another’s existence. Before, they would call and text each other all hours of the night to talk and keep each other company, and now they were lucky if a few words were exchanged. Things had changed. The little family they once were was broken.

What’s more is that a few people started talking about the others. Words that could not be taken back were spoken, and things took a turn for the worse. What really got out of hand was the fact that these words were not exchanged with the person whom there was a problem with. The words were spoken behind each other’s back.

What should have been resolved between one or two people quickly escalated into something more. However, since person A decided to talk about person B behind person B’s back, relations became even more strained.

What really made person B angry was that person A and company could have addressed any issues spot on and person B would have gone above and beyond to resolve those issues. She would have done anything for person A, but after what happened, person B wants nothing more to do with Person A or her new group of friends. It is quite sad because even now, after everything that has gone down, person B would still like to work things out with person A. However, from the looks of things, it does not seem that person A is willing to reach out and fix things. The irrational hate that person A feels towards person B is something that was completely unwarranted. Person B was completely left in the dark and feels as if they should not be in this situation. All she wants is to try and work things out, to try and understand what was going through person A’s mind, and to talk some sense into her. They were, after all, best friends at one point, so why should there be a rift among the friendship?

Does this sound familiar, children? If not, you are lucky that you never had to encounter such an awful situation. If you have gone through something like this, you know that it can be extremely hard to find out that someone you were once so close with had something so terrible to say about you. What’s more is that they do not have enough respect to address these issues directly. This is not high school or even grade school. This is college, how about we all act like adults and not talk about people behind their backs. Not to mention, this is not going to fly in the real world. Acting in this manner is completely unprofessional – keep this in mind next time you decide to stop being friends with someone.

The moral of the story is to not let something petty come between you and your friends. If there is an issue, address it. It is not a complicated gesture. Remind the person that you respect them enough to want to talk about things, and that you are taking the high road by talk to them. Act your age. Resorting to childish behavior is below you, so why even think about engaging in something like this? My advice is to just hold your head high and just move right along.


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