I Got You Girl: Recycling is not that hard

Sam Houston State University’s third annual Earth Week is wrapping up but that does not mean that your ecofriendly efforts have to come to an end. Reduce, reuse, and recycle are easy thoughts to keep in mind, and with finals approaching, I know you probably are too preoccupied to think about how to keep going green, so I got you once again.

Boys, we are not lying. Washing our hair is quite a full night for us long and thick haired gals. It takes a long time and a lot of resources to get our beautiful locks up to par. But wouldn’t life be easier if we could just cut showers all together, saving our water resources and reducing the amount of soaps in our water systems? I hear it is hip to do our natural musk these days. Perhaps we should let nature help us to pick our perfect mates through the smelly power of pheromones.

Turning off your electronics while not in use or simply unplugging them is of high importance or you know what? Make a quick trip back to the dark days by eliminating the allure of power strips and ditching your many devices.

Better yet, abandon that money pit of a house with all of its convenient yet eco-destructive features and live in a nice cardboard box- they are not only reusable, but recyclable. Take your childhood cardboard box forts and turn them into your rent and tax free fortress of ecofriendly solitude.

TLC’s Hoarders are very knowledgeable about the many potential uses for a single item. Watch an episode and take notes.

Washing your car is a waste of water and contributes to chemical run off. Why waste money washing your car when there is rain? It’s nature’s free car wash. Just pour some soap on your car right before a storm and you are good.

Just ditch your car. We are Texans and proud of it. Nothing looks sleeker than pulling up to campus or the saloon via Mustang, and by mustang, I mean the horse. Everyone else in the world assumes we still ride horse and buggy so why not just do it?

Texans like to make a big deal about not littering, but not all forms of littering are bad. When I worked at Texas A&M University I would eat a banana everyday on my walk to work and throw the peel in a dead flower bed outside my building. I was hounded by an Aggie telling me that I what I was doing was wrong, but you know what? I was doing their school a favor. Nutrients found in banana peels and egg shells are actually good and nutritious to soil and plants. Honestly, I should have charged them for fertilizing their dead plants because obviously their paid landscaping staff is not cutting it.

Thanks to Macklemore and Ryan Lewis’ 2012 song, “Thrift Shop,” thrifting is cool. Nothing is more chic than bringing a potential partner home to sheets that smell reminiscent of that time R. Kelly was accused of raping and urinating on an underage girl. Not everything is meant to be thrifted.

On a non-sarcastic note, we really should try to be better because this is our home and a home to others soon to come. Put a little love into the Earth and you will probably get a little back.


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