Letters to Lou: Love

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Question: When do I know I’m out of the “talking stage,” and I am his girlfriend?


It seems in college we blur the lines when it comes to dating. Every relationship is different. Though it may be cliché, actions are the biggest determinant of your relationship status. Be mindful of how he introduces you to others, how he interacts with you in public and if he makes decisions with you in mind.

A genuine conversation I feel is the best way to alleviate the stress of your place in his life. A successful relationship should be defined for multiple reasons: the main being that you all are aware of each other’s expectations and act accordingly.

Sometimes men love to have their cake and eat it, too. Without you voicing that you’d like a more permanent title in their life; you could stay in this murky and confused state with him. Leave it up to them; often they’ll allow it.

Hope you get results, girl!

Question: Valentine’s Day is approaching and I’m stuck between two women: one does everything I need/want, one is drop dead gorgeous. Should I choose one to take out or buy both gifts?


Well, you have a good one on your hands. It sounds like neither is your “girlfriend.” If so, you aren’t obligated to just focus on one. It may sound like a kind of player move, but if you spend genuine time with each, I don’t see the problem. Now, be very careful. At the end of the day there are feelings involved. Women don’t take kindly to feeling they are in competition. I would advise you to be discreet and mindful. Keep in mind this will be the first of many awkward days. There are more holidays to come. It would be in your best interest to figure out whose absence would affect you the most. If they were to find out, that is a risk of playing the field.

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